September 14, 1933

The question now confronting me is again the changing of occupation. On Oct. 4th I will take a civil service examination for the position of Junior Park Naturalist with the National Park Service. It will take me away from this country and I am afraid that it will mean the severing of my relations with the Border Lakes Outfitting Co., [and] the giving up of my dream to spend the winters writing. Of course it may also mean getting into a line of work that will give me just the sort of life I want, a chance to be out of doors most of the time, time to write and study and freedom from the classroom. There will be handicaps as well but there are those in any field.

The Border Lakes once we get on our feet should bring in about $1500 to $2000 per year. Then with the winter for writing, I should make another $500 or so, perhaps more. The question is now, can I take a chance or will I take a chance, a gamble on the future I want, or will I cut away from it all and tie myself up again in something that will make me unhappy.

This I can do, take a crack at it, keeping my interest in the Border Lakes until I see what I want to do and then come back and try to work it that way. Looking at it in that light, there is really not much to worry about except my job in the Junior College and I have never been overly in love with that.

In the last analysis, what I want is a working-writing combination, ala Thoreau and Burroughs. I do not think that I will be ever quite satisfied until I work out something like that. I am close to it now and perhaps don't know it.